[GameMaster] Danielle, TWiiZYY

Before I begin, I would like to apologize to Adam, Sorry that I put all the blame onto you before. I've just been under a lot of pressure, and I snapped.

[Name]: Danielle De Groat.

[IGN]: TWiiZYY.

[Age]: 20; May 30, 1990.

[Time Zone]: EST.

[Email]: xDWTCx@live.com

[Position]: Game Master.

[Brief description of yourself]: Fun, easy-going, I can be a real people-person, Know how to be serious when needed.

[Experience]: I was a GM for a good 6months on CitrixMS.

[Why should we choose you?]: You should choose me because, I know what i'm doing and I understand the responsibility behind being a GameMaster. I also play at times when there are no current GM's online, so it would be good once the server becomes populated. From experience you may notice that at time's I can have a short temper but i'm working on making myself better.. But I now believe personal issues should be separated from gaming life. I could help player's in need Or even a fellow GM, If needed. I know how to use Photoshop, If the server ever needed something i'd be glad to help out in that way. I'm easily reachable even if i'm at work. If you needed me to come on I could see what id be able to work out and I'd be here almost 24 hours a day from fri.-sun., since these are my days off.

I'm easily flexible, highly organized, and a bit dysfunctional. But who isn't! (:P) As i said, I can be VERY serious if the time/situation calls for it. Please, If you need to ask me anything else, Please PM me, or contact me via MSN. :]

Again, to Adam. I'm sorry.

Going away list.

Thing's I shall take with me when I leave..:

- Pet's..:

-Both fish tank's.

-Cat.

-1 hamster.

- Both Betta's.

-Large scale Items.

-1 Cabinet ( Large enough for the fishtank.)

-Bed

-Wooden desk I made.

-night stand.

-Smaller Scale Items.

-Fan.

-Lamp.

-t.v.

-ALL Cat, Fish, Hamster supplies.

-Personal Affect's.

-All clothing that I need/want.

-Laptop

-cellphone

-backpack's full of books/note's

MUST BUY'S:

-New Under's.

-New Tank's.

-New Bed Sheet's.

-New SOCK'S.

Etc..

Must DO's..:

-Setup a bank account.

-BECOME RESPONSIBLE. (With money mostly...)

-Try and lose weight?..

-Work More/Harder.

..Find someone to be with?...

all for now....

To Chris, I you ever see this..

See, i know this guy and I was nd still is madly in love with him.. On the inside im dieing.. On the out I look like I am.. The truth is that I just cant ind another guy out there like him and i prolly never will... I miss my big teddy bear so muuch...

This is a letter i wrote..

Dear Chris...,

Please read this all.. It would mean alot to me if you did.. Thankyou...

Dear Chris,

It's August 25th, 2010. Almost a year since ive even talked to you or heard you're voice.. I know you said you basicly didnt want anything to do with me anymore.. But.. I've been trying so damn hard to let go of you... but it's just to hard for me.. Everytime i do something.. It reminds me of you, I cant listen to any music without thinking about you.. You're picture always comes up on my comp.. You said to get rid of it but i just didnt have the heart to do it.. It hurts so much.. I know youve said you've moved on.. but i you can ind it in your heart o please give me a chance..

The reason I stopped calling was that.. I was affraid of calling, nd youre mom allways answering the phone.. I was just scared.. And i heard the way she talked to you Chris.. I didn't want that to happen.. I so sorry or just abandoing you like that.. I truly am..I deeply wish ou may orgive me or ever doing that to you.. I just didnt want you getting hurt from your mom like that, from the bottom o my heart... PLEASEEE Forgive me...

I.. was going thru some old wrightings I did nd i found a piece about you...

".....my mom saw chris.. I miss him like hell.. just thinking about it now makes me wish i was home, i cant fucking tke it anymore aeriously.. i wish i could be with him right now instead of being here in italy somewhat.. I just want to be able to be with him for a while, maybe just 2weeks.. its all i ask for.. i know im with someone, but the way i feel about chris is different, i look at his picture and i .. i just feel horrible for never calling him when i said i would always.. it make me wonder how many days he ha the phone with him, waiting for that phonecall, the houhgt only just kills me inside, the thought of disapointing him so much.. i wish i could just be there with him when i got home.. i hate myself for not being there.. This is the fucking reason i hate the way i am, being so god damn .. sensetive.. always needing someone, i cant a week being single cuz of how emotional i am, i need that arm to cry on when im down, chris is the most sensetive guy i know.. Im his teddybear... and hes my big baby.. i wish i could just sit here in his arms.. Even just the thought alone makes me feel empty inside like i know im alone here.. theresnothing i can do, i just wish i had somebody with me right now.. i need a comferting talk with someone.. tonight im contemplateing calling chris.. i just.. really do hope hes home when i do call... '

And..-

"..... meeting chris tho.. back then.. i never had the same feeling as i did now tho.. and still having them now..? i mean its been like 3yrs since iv known him, just about and i may never be able to talk to him again because of me being to affraid to ever call thinking about how much of a bitch his mom is an eveything.. I miss hearing his voice.. his laugh... the one he says everyine thinks is creepy.. i adore it.. i just cant get enoug of him.. his little whine he does... lol, it gets me everytime!!!!! I love him alot, i know i can turn to him whenever i need toand that if he ever needed a shoulder to cry on that i would be there for him whenever he needed me, and he KNOWS that..i will never be able to get over how in love i am with chris.. just the thought of possibly losing him drives me insane i could never handle it.. I LOVE CHRIS SO FUCKING MUUUUUCH!!!!!........."

I, just wanted you to know all of this chris.. I do still really love you, you were the only one to EVER make me feel as wanted as that. I still have an big empty space in my heart just waiting to be filled back up.. I promise anything from this point out would be different forever, I could change for you i you wanted me to, I'd do pretty much almost anything for you Chris...

I Love You...

PS. I you did take you're time to read everything above, thank you..

I really do love you chris.. More than i could ever explain.. And I truly would do anything for you..

Please give me that second chance.... :/

Thought's.

Relationship's..:

What have I learned? That relationship's really suck If you're like me. I'm... I don't know how I should say this, but, I'm different.. I've been threw so much heartache.. to the point where I've just stopped caring.. If it comes around.. then great I guess. But I've just had... not so much luck at all. I can understand to an extent, I'm not the most attractive individual of all.. And I may not look like a softie, but deep inside i am, and i'm just getting more and more tired with each passing day.. So much mental abuse.. I'm on the edge of giving everything i have, up. I just would love to be me, with that special someone.. I hate like... being with someone, but knowing that its only a temporary thing.. I don't do those well.. I need to be with someone knowing they'll always be there for me, forever. A guy that wouldn't lie to me, Someone that would just.. just talk with me.. Even though i'm probably living in my own little dream world.. well.. It is my dream, To just be with someone that accept's me and understand's me.. I sound desperate to you all.. But in a sense, I am.

Why is it that I always have to go through this every single time i end up in some type of 'long-term' "i think he's the one" relationship? It's just like it's never meant to be and there's nothing I can do about it. EVERY time.. I wish I could just feel something REAL, and not be lied to anymore. I hope.. one day it will all just change and It really happens.. I'd smile more, If I just had a reason to..

Life.

I alway's thought my life was defined.., Like i knew exactly what was going to happen to me from the time i was born till my death. But i found myself to be oddly mistaken about that. I never knew because i would always be online that, that would be where I was bound to found love. In the past it was usually like a childish game, finding 'bf' after 'bf'.., till you grow older.. and you start thinking about settling in and finding a meaningful relationship that would last you more than a month. People always talk about how bad online dating and relationships are, but they haven't had the opportunity OR the actual experience of it. You need to let yourself experience it at least once before you should be able to judge it. I've been doing it for years... I've had my "UP'S" my "WAY UP'S" and even the "DOWN'S" and "WAY DOWN'S".

Having an online relationship, is built completely on TRUST.. If you do not trust in each other it will never work in the long run.. If that is what your looking for.

In my personal experience I've been so completely mentally abused, and from the guy i thought i wanted to be with till the day I died.. But i was sadly mistaken. I was abused beyond repair.. although none of it was physical, the damage was there. From the end of that.. it would all be things like 1 day... or a week... half the month..., nothing with any emotion at all...; Then only recently.. have I found something even close.. to a real love.. it has only been a month since I've really only been talking to him, but something really just... clicked about him.. he managed to find a place in my heart, unlike any guy... even from my youngest age... this has just never happened to me before.. i feel like i can just 100% be myself and he'd love it! I asked him... "I never thought of myself as anything special. What did you see in me?.." he said.. "I saw you. As a funny friend first.. then i felt more."

I'm not sure, is it just me? Am i just lucky for once in my life?? Or is this just another heartbreak waiting to happen???

Well, whatever this is for now.. I'm lovin' EVERY second of it.. And i do consider him to be my everything.. He said he'd come with me on my trip to Italy next year.. for 2months.. If we still like each other by the end of the 2months.. we'll be Okay. (:

Intermission Video.

I don't remember if i told you he was moving back to PA., over the summer. which make's it not as bad since i cn rive now.. lol. I just found out that... also, one of his buddies will be moving in with him, so it might be a bit on the awkward side to meet him in pa for the first time. Man, my thought's are running and my mind wont settle!!!! Maybe once i meet him.. It won't be so bad! (: I'm way to excited to. I haven't been this happy since..... I thought i was in love for the first time ever. >_>; Well... I love my baby, b., MORE. :D.., and it'll be even better then ever. hehe, especially since i can drive now. :).

thats al for tonight, ill update u soon. :)

My Thoughts of the day.

Im turning 20 in 2 months. But im bound by life to become absolutely nothing, My future stands bleek, and my thoughts are blurring. Living a life with boundary's consumes ones own soul even quicker. Thinking it over this world might not just of been ready.. Or maybe it's the other way around.. maybe i wasn't ready to be here? To.. "Live life to it's fullest.." Im just nothing now.. having nothing to live for, being thought of as just a heep of thrash, my feelings on life hav become slim, and im starting to loose my grip on hope for a better tomorrow. Not really to sure what I should be doing from here on... but i guess i just have to take it a step at a time, and being alone don't really help you in this world.. I don't get along well with others and my emotions are almost shot, so relationships don't really hold well with me at all.. I know my ultimate destiny lays in being all alone and dieing that way, so I guess I'm going to have to slowly just.. live with that fact... because i know I don't mean anything to this world..

As i sit here and tell you this, I do surely keep the thought of suicide tucked deep in the back of my mind, but no-one really cares if i go, so what..? I actually hope it makes everyone feel guilty, that maybe, just maybe if they had attempted to care, this could of been prevented.. and it just haunt them for the rest of there lives. My "parents" mean well, and im sure theyd be bout' the only two people to care about if i was gone or not. Some people might be sad then get over it the next day, but always have that thought in the back of there mind.. "what.. if i just cared that much more.." There's really nothing anyone can do for me.. im a lost cause just dangling on the string of hope.. and well, it looks as if it's starting to break, and I'm kinda losing my grip.. Of course there isn't anythng anyone can do for me... I'm thousands of miles away from anyone Ive ever built up a friendship with..

But in he end they always say.. "It was the thought that counts." Yeah but the actions mean more...

Speak my mind more later.
pce.

Un-named.

I hear the glass shatter,

Still images begin to ripple.

I stare into my own eyes,

As I look upon them they change..

Black start's to cover my eye's,

Darkness slowly overcome's me..

As I stand there my vision dies,

And my world start's to fall.

Piece by piece..

Just as the glass shatter's..

It's life is lost and so is mine.

About Me.

I thought about it and ya know, I never gave you my Mini-Bio about myself.

I'll start with basic's.

My name's Danielle, but i prefer being called Dani. I'm 19 year's old and living in New Jersey. I have two VERY large family's. One being blood and the second being my Juggalo's, Psychopathic till the day I die!I live with god-parent's and one of my brother's. My status is currently Taken&Happy. Even though he lives kinda far away, I still like him the same! Hmm.. I'm on the taller & Kinda bigger side. Not trying to impress anyone here, Haha. I'm white as hell... Dark Brown eye's, Black&Red hair. ((My best feature, lol.)) I currently have 2 Tattoo's.. One is on my Right calf and the other is on the side of my left forearm. I only have plain ear piercing's but I am planning on getting an industrial done. And when I move out I plan to get Snakebite's, Tongue & Eyebrow pierced.

I have a VERY interesting personality.. I could be your best friend or your worst enemy. I'm extremely laid back and easy to talk too, And if we get a good conversation going I most likely won't shut up. :P It's very rare that I don't like someone, and if your one of those unfortunate kid's that got on my bad side there's always a good explanation for it. My list of Hated is very small, at the max 3, not including the brother I live with, lol. I can be extremely emotional if it come's down to it, and if I need to be fake.. Even though I hate to be, I can.

I have an extremely LARGE Music span. I like Everything from Country to DeathMetal. BUT, I can NOT without a dought, stand Techno music... Or anything sounding like Techno.. Rave... Just.. NO!!! I also detest Pop&Mainstream Rap, HATE IT.. Underground forever.

*Will be updated when I have time/Idea's.*

UPDATE!!

Please, Sit back and enjoy my update with some of my music! :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CXY9jIOvIIs

Well, I'll start with my Saturday morning. I woke up, got dressed and went to get my lunch. Then after that i went to The tattoo shop 'Black Work Tattoo' that's located in Little falls, NJ. I didn't get to video it, because by the time I remembered I was gonna, he was almost finished.. Oh well.. Maybe next time, lol.

This is it, Click Here.

Some more music!

http://www.youtube.com/user/demonic0ra#p/f/29/gaS__78ddCg

Pce out for now. :)

Learning something new.

Okay, this is just an update about my thought's .. After today, Ive decided to do something kinda exciting. I'm going to be teaching myself German. Ive had a bit of help so far, but I'm still an EXTREME NOOB. With a little bit of encouragement I'll be learning in no time at all.

I'll give you all update's on my movement's in how much Ive learned in a week.

Pce out for now. (:

Music! (Must Read!!)

You know what I was just thinking? Well, no... You don't cause if you did thatd been kinda weird/creepy..

Well, im a HUGE fan of music and I would never be able to live without it, haha. And Myself I have a very, very large music range.. Going from Country to Death Metal and a lot of in-between's. hough from when I was younger All the way threw high school I went through a lot of changes in music Styles.. and today I really disappointed that I didn't know about Metal until i was a sophomore in high school.

Here, I present you with my musical revolution..:
Grade's K thru 5.. - Pop & Starting Into some Rap/Hip-Hop & R&B.
*I used to be a huge Boy band fan, Like NSYNC' & Backstreet Boys.. Was a huge fan of other various pop singer's, I was Into R-Kelly, And a few other's..*

Grade's 6-8.. - Was mainly into Rap/HipHop & R&B.
*HUGE Fan of DMX, R.Kelly, Eminem, 50 Cents, Etc..*

Grade 9.. -Still into the same thing's..

Grade's 10-12.. - This is where I learned about Metal, and my life totally changed! I was still into some Rapper's at the time because of the kid's Ive been round since forever. But I did change..
*Short Bio. on how i became me. :) ; .. Okay, i promised i wouldn't talk about this game, but I have to if you all need to learn about my life, haha. Well, I joined this game called CombatGrounds, And i made one friend in particular, that had introduced me into this beautiful music, Metal. And to this day I shall not forget the name of that song..
"Living Dead Girl" By 'Rob Zombie'
What. A. Classic!!! From that day on my horizon spanned and I begun looking up new AND old Metal band's. And to this day I am still finding new, and better band's! Also I had discovered the not so hard version of metal.. ROCK! :)
And now to list a few of them.. :
Slayer, Disturbed, Metallica, 5FDP, SOAD, Silent Civilian, SlipKnot<3, As I Lay Dieing, Diecast, RED, Godsmack, I'll Nino, KoRn, Four Letter Lie, RAMMSTEIN, DragonForce, NickelBack, Lifehouse, Chevelle, Opeth, Fate, Dio, Flyleaf, Atreyu, 12 Stones, Trivium, Soilwork & MANY, MANY More..

Now, Ive Graduated High School, but my music taste Had just been updated.. Who do i see on CombatGround's after about 2 year's of not talking? Haha, You guessed it... The same guy that once Introduced me into Metal.. But this time he brought me wisdom of a New Genre of music... Rap..? I thought all rapped purely SUCKED, by the time i had graduated high school and that was it.. But... I was very very wrong.. He introduced Me to the 2nd best thing of my entire life.. And he truly.. TRULY, changed me forever! He tolled me about ICP, at first I really wasn't into the whole rap deal, but he tolled me about Psychopathic Record's and how there a lot different then regular rap. He Introduced me to Twiztid... I was hoked at the first song.. It took me a while to warm up to the music, but after that, you wouldnt be able to get me to stop listening to them. THEN, HE TELL'S ME ABOUT HOW PSYCHOPATHIC IS LIKE ONE WHOLE BIG FAMILY, And about Juggalo's/lette's. I really didn't grasp it at first, but now That Ive been down, Being a Juggalo is a way of life.. We don't care what anybody thinks, and we back up are family no matter what goes on. You need a place to stay for a while? Hit up some fam., I'm sure they'd be down to let you stay a few night's if you needed. I can honestly say now, that i truly love my life and all psychopathic. "I SEEN THE LIGHT!!!" Haha.. But that's really it..

There is nothing better then bumpin' some wicked shit while you're ridin' down the road. ;)
Exp: Insane Clown Posse, Blaze Ya Dead Homie, Twiztid, Anybody Killa, Boondox, Axe Murder Boys. some group's by them..: Psychopathic Rydas, Dark Lotus.

To this day I still love all them, and will continue too till im dead.
I'll be down with the clown till im dead in the ground!! ;) "ma' fuckoo'."

Pceee.

DWI-TV

Hey guys!

I just here today to review a website called "DWI-TV". They have all sort's of great thing's Movie's on demand, tv show's, cartoons, all sort's of different thing's :). You can also request a Movie/Show/Anime. And they'll have it up in no more than an hour's time.

Here's the site: http://dwi-tv.com/

I'll Give it 4/5 Star's. :P
Thanks for you're time reading this.

For my Dad.

Hey guy's I thought id let you all get to know me a bit more, and i thought.. Hey! Why not let you know about an important fact! My Dad passed away February 1, 2008. And It has been 2year's now that he's left us.. So in commemoration, for him, I'd like to post this for you all to know..

This Poem Was for him..

"Good-Bye"

What was once loved,
Is now gone.
What once made you so happy,
Is forever lost.
What was once you're confidant,
Is now gone.
You're heart filled once,
With something so precious,
The last thing you said was
"I Love You."
If we could only hear you're voice once more,
This time in our lives wouldn't be so hard.
To say Good-Bye,
For The Last Time....

The Melbourne Shuffle

Say whaa??... That's right, Dani now updates you with the past, but with some news about it! You remember that crazz people had about that thing called 'The Melbourne Shuffle' Not as popular as it once was but still well known to many! Here, my friend Alex Chirino's, Does some Novice Shuffling. :P It's very good in my opinion!

Hope you Enjoyed it. I'll keep you all posted on his future video's. :)

Vacation In Italy!

One for the most amazing place's to every vacation, and i was there for 2 whole months. :) So many beautiful place's to visit! And a lot of GREAT Local place's no1's ever really heard of. This shall be an amazing adventure for you all, and a great place for me to share some wonderful WONDERFUL memories, hehe.

My trip begins June 29th or 30th. The airport was a HUGE rush as always, And the service was minimum.. They did what they needed and they would move on with thing's. I honestly can not remember a time when being on a plane was just so plain..... Boring? Last time I flew over We used Al Italia'.., This time we used Air France. God, How i hate the french.. I will never use them again, There all dead and snobby, and just plain suck. I love Italians, But i wouldn't marry one, haha. (My grandpa is a total ass to my grandma, so Ive learned to not marry Italian, haha.) Back on topic i assume, 9-10 hour's of being on plane's takes a toll on you. FINALLY, IM HOME!!! BEAUTIFUL ITALIA!

I haven't been home in years! So this was one of the best day's ever. To my left is my grandparents 3story home. and next store built into it would be my Aunt Maria's house. She's a very nice lady, and just amazing. This year was actually a very very special year for everyone. My grandparents threw a party for my mom, who hadn't been to Italy in almost 25years! As excited as i had been for this entire trip, In the end it was slightly disappointing because we had to basically babysit my baby brother for most of it, and that was very un-fun. He's very cute, but so Annoying.
Anyway, That was basically the first two week's, Party for my mom. We managed to have a pretty good time there while she was with us, We went to Venice and we actually managed to get lost, haha, It was so bad.. I also had a new experience there which I would rather not bring up right now. Hah. We visited alot of places in that 2 or 3weeks she was here with us, But everyone agree's that it was not enough time for her to enjoy herself, or for others to enjoy her company. I'm sure she was mostly missed by her little kid though. She left him with us while she had to go back to work sadly that was the most they would let he take off at a time, she did get to go back for her mom's birthday! :)

Now I shall show you some of the place's that I had visited during my great experience In Italy! :) This town i was living in is called 'Montenars' If I'm correct.. It's not really a tourist spot, Unless people are hiking up to the church near the top of the mountain range.

This Photo is from my grandma's House from the 2nd floor. Just simply stunning!!

This is Largo!!! BEAUTIFUL TRUE BLUE WATER'S. The coldest water's you may ever swim in, So unforgiving. I don't think Ive quite forgiven myself for it yet, haha.


Not 100% the best combined picture, but i really tried. The camera auto-adjusts so it couldn't be too perfect exactly. Everything about it is amazing though.. Such a beautiful sunset.. Speechless...

This is a very well known and visited church to tourist's located in 'Gemona del Friuli'.. If you'd like to see the true size of this church ClickHere.

Some Poetry.

I was fooling around online, And I found some of my old Poem's so Id like to share them with you. (:

"No Hope."

I looked in the mirror,
Then turned a cheek.
The vision i saw wasn't me,
But the future of another.
The life he had,
Just thrown away in a cloud of dust.
Wishing he knew the way,
So confused in this world.
Why?
What purpose does this serve?
Only one way out,
My sight turn's black..
My eye's closed shut tight..
I only hope for him,
A better future..

========================

"Last Look."

Watch me fade.
The distance get's wider.
You'll never see my eyes again,
The moment i looked away,
Would be the last thing you saw of me.
Times changed,
Life has been altered.
No longer can you look into my eyes,
Without seeing hate burn with a deep passion.
Stop wondering when you have an answer.
No longer can you see,
This was your last look.
Last Look Into My Eyes..

======================

"Good-Bye"

What was once loved,
Is now gone.
What once made you so happy,
Is forever lost.
What was once you're confidant,
Is now gone.
You're heart filled once,
With something so precious,
The last thing you said was
"I Love You."
If we could only hear you're voice once more,
This time in our lives wouldn't be so hard.
To say Good-Bye,
For The Last Time....